mirroring

a totally new concept to me since becoming a parent! something that I would have loved to know from day one and beyond. so I share it with you today :) trusting that it’s meeting you right where it’s meant to.

so much of how our children present can actually be a reflection - mirroring - of our own bodies! a wild concept. but one that I find to totally fit into a perspective of a Thoughtful Creator. here’s a video talking all about it. what made this make sense to me was how, in this video, they talk about how its a surival mechanism -

“I look like you so you won’t kill me”

or in a more mild way - “I look like you so I’m safe”

oh, you open your mouth when you sleep? so will I.

you tail is tucked? so is mine.

your chest is collapsed forward? me too.

and better yet -

your throat is open, so is mine.

your tongue rests on the roof of your mouth, so will mine.

you sleep in Bow - so will I!

you know the whole “she looks just like her dad when she sleeps! same position and everything! twins!” this. is by. DESIGN. (I’m convinced that genetics, as we’ve known them to be, might actually be a result of mirroring. in minor and major ways!)

and maybe it’s not an always, but I definitely believe it’s a sometimes (or even most times). for me, this came as a relief! a lot of worry came, for me, through not knowing how to help, what’s wrong, what the solution might be, etc. and when I was presented with this concept it was like oh!

I might hold the key to this.

with each touch, our children are mapping themselves off of us. when they reach up to touch our face, it goes way deeper than what’s perceived. they’re feeling and absorbing how we are holding ourselves. when they’re little toes brush up against us during the night, same thing. they can feel and sense how we’re postured while holding them, rocking them, nursing them, they were designed to learn, form and protect themselves in this way.

in order for my son and future children to be as open as they can be and thriving, as they were designed to, I’m able to posture myself (literally) in a way to make that possible for them.

so if your child is presenting “closed” (through consistent spitting up, colic, snoring, restlessness, tongue tie, structural abnormalities, etc) vs “open” (sleeping soundly, closed mouth while breathing, untucked tailbone, structurally sound, vibrant, clarity in their eyes, etc), you could hold the key. in the most liberating way! this goes for both parents if both are equally active in raising the child. they will mirror the both of you! I do think there is something specific to the Mother, though, as so much of our posture and nervous system regulation sets the scene and the vibration of the home. and if you’re pregnant reading this, it starts now. as your baby is picking up on everything from and through you. <3 what a gift.

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how I started shifting myself structurally / adjusting my posture (emotionally and physically) was and is through bowspring classes. @korimeloy on instagram is an incredible resource for this, and who I initially learned about these classes through. they’re online, and taught by an incredible teacher named amanda. she is a wealth of knowledge, gentle, gifted, and truly helping shift the environment of Home and the state of our children through the work that she does. I would suggest taking her “begin your bow” class first, as she lays the groundwork for how you’ll be holding your body during these classes and the terms that will be used - which is huge for the mind-body connection. from there, moving to the “awaken your bow” classes and staying consistent with those (I try to attend class every week or every other.)

since starting these classes a few months ago, I’ve noticed a major shift just structurally within my own body. I’m able to reach shelves that I would have normally had to stand on a stool to reach (!!) and I even had to adjust the mirror in my car because I was sitting too high up to see through it properly (!!!). after each classes, my husband and I laugh because my body looks so different, the way it’s being held. and the biggest piece of it all -

the way my son sleeps!

he used to sleep with his mouth open, snore, was incredibly restless and tucked his tail. and now there is absolutely no snoring, mouth is closed, no more squirmies (as we would call them haha) and tail is open (sleeping in Bow).

and we adjusted absolutely nothing with him.

this all came as a result of him mirroring the new way I was holding myself. how cool is that!!!! truly such a testament to how intricately we were designed, the supernatural connection that is established between parent and child, and the gift we’re given by God to hold the key to a peace-filled home and body.

shots

I’ve been sitting on this one for a while. this is a topic that feels very very heavy in my heart and I really wanted to do it justice. I realize, though, that this goes way beyond you reading this column. if this is your first time looking into this, then it’s just the tip of the iceberg. and if you’ve done your research before, then I know that this is one of many. I think as parents we wish (and believe) that we can trust what’s out there.

“they would never create something that would actually harm my child”

this thinking is increasingly dangerous, as the world will continue to throw things at our children relentlessly if we don’t partake in our duty as MOM and DAD, to be the gatekeepers of our home. taking time to sit with different topics or ideas or paths, bringing it to the Holy Spirit and sensing in our own spirits if it’s right. to take time to look into something that might feel a bit off. and that will look different for each family, but we owe it to our children to do so. it is our greatest honor here! to protect them so that their generation can be free. we consciously brought them into this world and we must do our due diligence. and by being here right now, in this moment, you are doing that. THANK YOU.

I’ll keep this brief, as it really is just an offering and invitation for you to dig a little deeper into something that you must feel is a bit off too, since you’re here now. I offer it all to you in love! trusting that it will land in the hearts of the parents it’s meant to and resonate with those who’s time it is to hear it.

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the history

“shots work though, don’t they? haven’t they single handily eradicated many diseases that are no longer around today?”

if you actually look at the decline of these diseases, you’ll see that they were already on a steep decline before each shot was introduced (except in the case of smallpox, which actually increased it’s cases after the shot was enforced). this decline is credited to new sanitary practices that were evolving! specifically clean water. and also important to note - they declined simultaneously in europe, who was not partaking in mass immunizations. outbreaks still can occur to this day, but always look a bit closer into where it originated, as it is almost always from someone who already had the immunization.

excerpt from the book the nourishing traditions book of baby & child care

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ingredients

we look at the ingredient list on our mac and cheese but we don’t look at the ingredient list of the injection that’s going into our children’s bodies. (!!!) which includes formaldehyde, heavy metals, and in some cases - aborted fetal cells. you read that right! it’s unthinkable, and we are not truly giving informed consent if we don’t know this. these ingredient lists are specifically called “inserts” and you can ask your doctor to see them (since more than likely you will not be given them initially.) there is also a website that clearly lays them out for you to search through, covering different shots available on the market. very thankful for this website as it remains totally neutral! just providing documents straight from the cdc or government affiliated websites -

justtheinserts.com

excerpt from the book the nourishing traditions book of baby & child care

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there is no liability

if your child gets injured (big or small) from a shot, nobody is liable. not the doctors office you were at, not the practitioner who administered it, not the manufacturer, nobody. if there is an injury, then you would need to report it to VAERS.

my opinion - if someone was liable, they would do everything to make sure it really is totally safe. if not, there would be way less incentive, if any.

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the schedule today / well-checks

excerpt from the book the nourishing traditions book of baby & child care

the schedule has increased an incredible amount, and yet, doesn’t it seem like us and children are sicker than ever?

this is even 7 years out of date. TODAY (2023), a child is set to receive 52 doses of 15 shots by the age of 6 and 72 doses of 17 shots by age 18.

the main reason to attend a well-check for your child is for them to receive their shots. if you do not plan on giving them any and don’t have any other concerns you’re wanting to talk to your provider about, these appointments are relatively useless. while, it’s increasingly difficult to find a pediatrician who will honor the choices you’re making for your child if you choose to not. i do think it’s also important to note - pediatricians get a larger payout if their patients are receiving immunizations. this could be the reason there’s a bit more of a push back if you choose to decline.

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resources

to further your research into this topic here are a few resources that do a great job at remaining neutral and simply presenting facts / data / studies. our bodies were intricately designed to restore themselves, naturally. it was all thought out, in detail, by our perfect Creator.

https://vaccine.guide/

https://drive.google.com/drive/mobile/folders/1LDdHoGrvz2ivpnc6XcIhflf1FDWvniHa

https://www.essentiallyerin.com/vaccines

this link will take you to a myriad of books and documentaries that are incredibly helpful to dig into and share with others who might be interested.

also - candace owens created a series over on the parler app, covering each shot and the history behind it. her voice as an advocate but more so as a MOTHER is powerful and truly invaluable. definitely worth setting up an account just to tune into that!

the placenta.

I recently have become placenta obsessed? :)

it’s always seemed amazing to me, how our bodies just spontaneously grow an entire organ that fully nourishes and sustains human life. it’s insane! and a true miracle. it wasn’t until recently when I read robin lim’s book, placenta - the forgotten chakra, that I gained a whole new reverence for this part of creation. it took on a whole new meaning!

the following is just a peek into robin’s book! but I still highly highly recommend you read it for yourself, as this really is the tiniest glimpse in :) and as a side note - you don’t have to agree entirely with someones stance on something in order to still glean something from it. filtering everything through the lens of our Father’s design, heart, and intent, we’re able to have our eyes opened to some pretty incredible things.

“when i am asked ‘why don’t you cut the babies’ umbilical cords?’ I say, ‘isn’t the real question : why do you cut?’” - robin lim

I’ve been a firm believer in prolonged delayed cord clamping for a while now! which is still super important. I never really considered though… not cutting it at all? christina wadsworth, a woman whose birth testimony is in robin’s book, considers it the first unnecessary surgery, and especially one with general uselessness. she says “I am concerned about the way our society enforces separateness, even from birth.” when i was pregnant, you could make me cry on the spot if we started talking about having to sever the cord. I couldn’t stand the thought of being disconnected from my son (and maybe intuitively was feeling that something was off about that process). I never considered that there was an even gentler, and more organic, option.

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when your baby is born, you have a few options regarding the intactness of the placenta :

immediate cord cutting - this happens before the delivery of the placenta and most of the time even before being placed on the mother’s chest. despite there being known risk in this (loss of 1/3 of baby’s blood supply, lower breastfeeding rates, nutrient loss, etc.), this still seems to be common hospital policy unless specified otherwise.

delayed cord cutting - even just for 3 minutes, but still before delivery of placenta.

prolonged delay - around 15 minutes. once the placenta is delivered, baby is latched, and cord is done pulsing. this can ensure nearly 99% of the babies blood supply and nutrients returns to them. <3

full lotus birth - allowing the cord to release from the baby in it’s own time, usually 3-7 days.

and instead of cutting or clamping, there is also an option of burning! between two candles held by each parent. <3 robin details how this is done in her book. regardless of which option you would choose, my encouragement to you would be that you have time. there is no hurry :) you’re allowed to take it moment by moment or day by day depending on what feels right for you and your baby.

“it’s amazing how complicated we can make it to not intervene.” - christina wadsworth

most hospital practices believe that delaying a cord cut could cause jaundice in babies. yet, the umbilical cord actually closes on it’s own once the baby receives the proper amount of blood. (perfect design! like always! hehe) so severing the cord for this reason actually turns out to be unnecessary.

I think it’s extremely important to consider the baby here, too. this cord is theirs and this placenta is theirs. it’s their Tree of Life, and it belongs to them. baby’s voices are frequently stripped from them, happening as early as conception. I believe it’s our duty as Parent to give them their voice back and consider their desires too, even if they don’t have the words to voice that yet.

“immediate or early clamping or cutting of babies’ umbilical cords is the biggest most widespread, medically sanctioned Human Rights issue on earth! together, we can make this a thing of our past. may our babies all be blessed by our patience.” - robin lim

on fathers cutting the cord - in her book, robin says - “what message is this sending to the baby? this casts the father in the role of ‘separator’ and may have a profound affect on the family dynamics.”

this part left me speechless. I believe that God is in symbolism, and literally severing the connection between mom and baby could definitely play out in a very real way. it’s interesting looking at it this way now, seeing how my husband and son’s relationship has progressed. our son does seem to to be more hesitant to go to my husband at times, almost like “you’re the one who separates me from mom”. it’s hard to explain. but now I feel like I might actually have found the words for it! in my heart I’ve already decided that he will never be cutting the cord again. <3 and! it’s a very real thing for babies to be able to pick up on different emotions and situations, even at this age. and in utero! I think we need to give them more credit here, as to what they’re also taking away from the experience.

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lotus birth

while this may not be the most convenient option for the parents, this time of rest, mindfulness, and closeness can be something so so holy. holding the third stage of labor in highest regard is something that seems to be extremely looked over as we quickly want to dress baby, bathe baby, separate baby from mom, have a cloud of visitors wanting to hold the baby, etc. staying connected, still, and TOGETHER, might take us stepping out of the norm, especially in the rushed reality that surrounds us. but I think it would be worth fighting for. :)

in the lotus birth testimonies in the book, parents describe how alive the cord felt, even pulsing still when breastfeeding DAYS later, how the baby would smile when the father would tend to the placenta, and how peace-filled and confident these children then grew to be. with letting the baby have their say in letting go, we allow them to be a part of this beautiful completion and beginning.

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again, please consider reading her book! this is truly just scratching the surface. I wish I could put one into the hands of every mama or soon to be mama, and birth worker. i believe it’s of utmost importance and could change the world. hehe I know that sounds silly, but our Beginning sets the course for the rest of our life, our interactions, and our livelihood. us as parents have such a special opportunity to make it the most peace-filled and gentle as possible. <3

the book also includes how to’s for everything I mentioned above, recipes if you choose to consume your placenta after delivery, testimonies from families who have chosen lotus births, extensive research, and so much more.

I’m so grateful to our Creator who thought out every detail. for creating this connection so thoughtfully and with so much intention. my hope is that we can all honor that in the way that we sense is best. <3

free those toesies!

nothing has been more satisfying to me than watching my son grow into himself naturally - mind body and spirit! when we first began dressing him, I started realizing how many baby clothes and shoes aren’t necessarily made with their structural development in mind. mainly just for cute. hehe so we avoided onesies with booties attached, any shoes and socks, and swaddles. (while some babies may find comfort in a swaddle, it definitely isn’t “womb-like” like we’re told it is.) and to free their little toesies, I believe, is one of the best things we can do for them at this age! for the obvious structural benefits, but also for proper motor development and spacial awareness as they learn how their skin even moves against things.

we also avoided any baby containers for this same reason! as those have been connected to improper movement and/or delayed physical development. instead of giving him a seat to sit up in, we waited until he was ready to do so himself. and instead of giving him a walker, we waited for him to walk himself. and we were amazed at how much quicker these skills seem to come if let to discover them on their own. all part of Perfect Design! they were made to intuitively know when they’re ready and how to do so.

basically - LESS IS MORE. :) let our babies be free in every way! remaining in their original form and design.

and as adults, this is also important! I think most of our feet are now shoe-shaped instead of foot-shaped, due to the shoes most of us grew up wearing. thankfully we can wear some stylish toe separators to help restore the natural shape of our feet! (which has been also linked to lower pain within the rest of our bodies, specifically our backs, since everything. is. connected.) I wear mine during the evenings and they are actually so comfortable and satisfying to watch work haha

here are some great “barefoot” shoe options for babies and into adulthood to help maintain this original shape!

vivo barefoot

earth runners

splay shoes

jack and lilly

be lenka

ten little

softstar shoes

unshoes footwear

xero shoes

image via @vivobarefoot on instagram

image via @korimeloy on instagram

circumcision.

as I’ve mentioned before, I don’t count on research or data to prove something to be true or false. normally, it starts in my gut. and almost every single time the facts actually end up aligning with that. I know I may seem crazy when I say this but even if it didn’t, I would go with both my intuition / what I’ve gathered from time spent in prayer. that being said, before I had researched a single thing about circumcision, there was something about it that wasn’t sitting right. and what I found ended up following suit!

the main points that most people make for circumcision is that it’s done either for sanitary, biblical, or aesthetic reasons. so when researching for myself, those are the ones I focused on. and here’s what I found :

1. sanitary - the foreskin was designed with a purpose. it’s not only protective but it’s covered in essential glands and nerve endings. it regulates temperature, moisture, PH balance, enzyme levels and contains antiviral properties. the modern procedure is based off the belief that removing it would prevent disease, which has since been proven invalid. and I will add in here - there is proper care for an intact penis. almost any / all issues you would hear with uncircumcised males originated from improper care, usually simply from retracting the foreskin too soon. (other than that the care is very very basic, cleaning just as you would a finger until they are able to retract it naturally, usually in years of puberty.) there is actually no medical organization in the world that recommends routine infant circumcision. it’s an elective, cosmetic procedure.

2. biblically - circumcision is mentioned quite a bit in the bible and it’s important for us to understand the procedure that was performed in those days. which was actually a small slit in the tip of the foreskin, in order to shed a couple drops of blood. there was no actual removal of any part of the foreskin. the bloodshed was meant for the payment of sins, which Jesus then redeemed for us on the cross. thank you, King! (1 Corinth 12:18 and Galatians 5:1)

3. aesthetically - if I hear “but what if they get made fun of in the locker room” one more time…!!! (!!!) there is also the thought that a lot of men can have - they want their son to look like them. which I totally empathize with! that would eventually warrant a conversation if your son ever is curious about the difference, totally. is that reason enough to remove a part of their bodies that’s there by heavenly design? it doesn't seem to me that the Creator made that big of an error. the united states is the only country that has ever consistently, or even at all, performed this procedure. though even the statistics in the states are moving towards 50/50 of circumcised vs whole males. and if you haven’t, I would encourage you to watch a video of the procedure before ever moving forward with anything.

4. there’s a 4th one here that I want to add because it feels like a very important piece that maybe isn’t considered. I don’t think the psychological / emotional trauma that is stored in the body at such a fresh age is taken into consideration as much as it should be. I would guess the majority of men don’t consciously remember the procedure, since they were just days old at the time. yet our bodies do have the capability of remembering. this is known information. and they can store emotions and events deep within our physical body and subconscious, which we then carry forward with us throughout our life. and in this case, probably unknowingly. coming out possibly in the form of emotional irregularity - being more removed from your emotions and having a harder time accessing and expressing them. which men do seem to have a harder time with more than women. would that really be by design? or could it be something deeper that only men would experience? we obviously can’t know this for sure, but I do think the possible trauma that would occur at just days old is something to seriously consider.

I could go on even more about the fact that it’s a billion dollar business, informed consent / the ethical dilemma, etc. ultimately though, I believe that leaving the foreskin in tact aligns the most with original Design. I don’t believe that our God makes mistakes that would result in the immediate removal of a body part directly after birth. I believe that it’s there for a purpose, and leaving babies whole, as originally designed, can best honor that intricate and thoughtful Creation.

yourwholebaby.org

intaction.org

drmomma.org

savingsons.org

doctorsopposingcircumcision.org