mirroring

a totally new concept to me since becoming a parent! something that I would have loved to know from day one and beyond. so I share it with you today :) trusting that it’s meeting you right where it’s meant to.

so much of how our children present can actually be a reflection - mirroring - of our own bodies! a wild concept. but one that I find to totally fit into a perspective of a Thoughtful Creator. here’s a video talking all about it. what made this make sense to me was how, in this video, they talk about how its a surival mechanism -

“I look like you so you won’t kill me”

or in a more mild way - “I look like you so I’m safe”

oh, you open your mouth when you sleep? so will I.

you tail is tucked? so is mine.

your chest is collapsed forward? me too.

and better yet -

your throat is open, so is mine.

your tongue rests on the roof of your mouth, so will mine.

you sleep in Bow - so will I!

you know the whole “she looks just like her dad when she sleeps! same position and everything! twins!” this. is by. DESIGN. (I’m convinced that genetics, as we’ve known them to be, might actually be a result of mirroring. in minor and major ways!)

and maybe it’s not an always, but I definitely believe it’s a sometimes (or even most times). for me, this came as a relief! a lot of worry came, for me, through not knowing how to help, what’s wrong, what the solution might be, etc. and when I was presented with this concept it was like oh!

I might hold the key to this.

with each touch, our children are mapping themselves off of us. when they reach up to touch our face, it goes way deeper than what’s perceived. they’re feeling and absorbing how we are holding ourselves. when they’re little toes brush up against us during the night, same thing. they can feel and sense how we’re postured while holding them, rocking them, nursing them, they were designed to learn, form and protect themselves in this way.

in order for my son and future children to be as open as they can be and thriving, as they were designed to, I’m able to posture myself (literally) in a way to make that possible for them.

so if your child is presenting “closed” (through consistent spitting up, colic, snoring, restlessness, tongue tie, structural abnormalities, etc) vs “open” (sleeping soundly, closed mouth while breathing, untucked tailbone, structurally sound, vibrant, clarity in their eyes, etc), you could hold the key. in the most liberating way! this goes for both parents if both are equally active in raising the child. they will mirror the both of you! I do think there is something specific to the Mother, though, as so much of our posture and nervous system regulation sets the scene and the vibration of the home. and if you’re pregnant reading this, it starts now. as your baby is picking up on everything from and through you. <3 what a gift.

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how I started shifting myself structurally / adjusting my posture (emotionally and physically) was and is through bowspring classes. @korimeloy on instagram is an incredible resource for this, and who I initially learned about these classes through. they’re online, and taught by an incredible teacher named amanda. she is a wealth of knowledge, gentle, gifted, and truly helping shift the environment of Home and the state of our children through the work that she does. I would suggest taking her “begin your bow” class first, as she lays the groundwork for how you’ll be holding your body during these classes and the terms that will be used - which is huge for the mind-body connection. from there, moving to the “awaken your bow” classes and staying consistent with those (I try to attend class every week or every other.)

since starting these classes a few months ago, I’ve noticed a major shift just structurally within my own body. I’m able to reach shelves that I would have normally had to stand on a stool to reach (!!) and I even had to adjust the mirror in my car because I was sitting too high up to see through it properly (!!!). after each classes, my husband and I laugh because my body looks so different, the way it’s being held. and the biggest piece of it all -

the way my son sleeps!

he used to sleep with his mouth open, snore, was incredibly restless and tucked his tail. and now there is absolutely no snoring, mouth is closed, no more squirmies (as we would call them haha) and tail is open (sleeping in Bow).

and we adjusted absolutely nothing with him.

this all came as a result of him mirroring the new way I was holding myself. how cool is that!!!! truly such a testament to how intricately we were designed, the supernatural connection that is established between parent and child, and the gift we’re given by God to hold the key to a peace-filled home and body.